freaking out

So a couple nights ago,  I woke up to let my dogs out at around 3 in the morning, and I started to think "what if all 5 eggs fertilized?".  I started to freak out and laid awake for about an hour thinking about the possibilities.  Keep in mind the Hubs had this freak out last week and I totally laughed it off.  Keep in mind, with my son's pregnancy I started to funnel (internally dilate) at 19 weeks and was on bed-rest until 36 weeks.  After my son's birth I traveled about 5 hours to undergo a procedure called a trans-abdominal cerclage. It is kinda like really strong fishing line that is at the bottom of my uterus to take pressure off my cervix.  There are girls on my cervix insufficiency support group who have carried twins to term, but not triplets or more. So which brings me to the topic of selective reduction.....

I feel like we have already been through hell with years of trying to conceive and then having 3 miscarriages once we did.  I feel like God should throw me a bone.  Maybe I was just selfish undergoing the IUI and should have just enjoyed my son. Who knows.  First pregnancy test on Friday and follow-up Monday, so which me luck! Also, my day 21 progesterone test was 53, whatever that means!